Getting to Grips With Yourself - 12.06.2026

I think the first thing that hits me is being grateful to be alive.

There have been two occasions in my life when I genuinely wondered why I was still here. For a long time afterwards, I wrestled with that question. It sat quietly in the background while life carried on around me.

During that time, I struggled with my condition and with the bigger question of how I was supposed to move forward. Life doesn't stop because you're trying to make sense of things. There was still a family depending on me. There was food to put on the table, bills to pay, and a roof to keep over our heads. You know the picture.

Writing was always there in the background. It wasn't a career. It wasn't a grand plan. It was simply something that helped keep my brain moving. It gave me a place to think, reflect, and make sense of what was happening around me.

It is very easy, when life becomes difficult, to sit back and allow events to happen to you. To wait for whatever comes next and simply deal with it when it arrives.

I think pride played a part in keeping me going. Not necessarily the negative kind of pride, but the determination that says, "I will keep trying." Looking back, that stubbornness probably helped me more than I realised.

I've always loved writing and I've always loved helping people.

Friends often rang me to share their problems. Somehow I was able to listen, understand where they were coming from, and help them see another perspective. Sometimes I could barely keep up with my own life, yet there always seemed to be room to help somebody else.

Life itself was busy enough.

Running a household, feeding children, feeding childminder children, cleaning, washing, shopping, organising, and somehow trying to create happy memories along the way. There were paper rounds too — and yes, they were mine.

Looking back now, those years were exhausting, but they were also good years. The house was full, life was noisy, and there was always something to do.

As I've grown older, I've noticed something changing.

The desire to contribute remains exactly the same, but the energy isn't always what it once was. Yet the practical realities of life remain. We still need to eat. We still need to pay bills. We still need to find purpose. And if we're lucky, perhaps enjoy a small holiday now and again.

That realisation forced me to start asking questions.

What comes next?

How do I move forward?

What skills do I already have?

What can I learn?

What opportunities still exist?

I don't pretend to have all the answers.

What I do know is that every time I have stopped learning, stopped growing, or stopped trying, life has become smaller.

Whenever I have been willing to learn something new, write something new, or take a small step forward, life has opened up again.

Perhaps getting to grips with yourself isn't about having all the answers.

Perhaps it's about accepting where you've been, recognising what you've survived, and deciding that your story isn't finished yet.

For me, writing remains part of that journey.

Maybe that's why you're reading this today.I want to try to build a path that shows what I've found, what I've explored, and what I've learned along the way.

Not because I have all the answers.

Far from it.

But sometimes seeing somebody else's journey can help us recognise possibilities we may not have considered ourselves.

Some of the opportunities, books, courses, tools, and ideas I share may fit exactly where you are in life. Others may not. They may simply spark a thought, open a door, or encourage you to look in a direction you hadn't previously considered.

That's perfectly okay.

Every person's journey is different.

My hope is that this website becomes a place where people can discover opportunities, learn new skills, find useful resources, and perhaps gain a little encouragement when they need it most.

I also believe there is great value in sharing what we learn.

Too often people struggle alone, believing they must figure everything out for themselves. Yet some of the most valuable lessons I have learned came from other people who were willing to share their experiences, mistakes, successes, and ideas.

Perhaps we can do the same for one another.

If something I share helps you, wonderful.

If something you discover helps somebody else, even better.

Life has taught me that we rarely move forward entirely on our own. Along the way there are books, teachers, friends, family members, strangers, and unexpected opportunities that help point us in the right direction.

Maybe DealModa can become one of those signposts.

Not a place that claims to have all the answers, but a place that encourages people to keep learning, keep exploring, and keep moving forward.

Because no matter where we are starting from, there is always another step we can take.